June 28, 2004
today is the last day of my five-month internship in corporate finance/mergers & acquisitions. it's been wonderful-- one of the best experiences in my life. i have learned a lot about the industry, german, people, and work in general, and felt fortunate to have been able to work with so many talented coworkers for 13+ hours a day. i'm really very grateful to have been here.
that said, i thought i'd reflect upon some of the little lessons intern life has provided over the past 150-odd days. may i present:
la petite princesse's guide to being a good intern
#1. always work hard and stay busy. (corollary: write posts for website at home the night before and not when you should be putting together presentations or doing financial analysis. like right now, i'm in my apartment).
#2. don't smoke in the office. when a semi-obscure '90s artist sang "cigarettes will kill you" he failed to mention that coworkers might kill and/or inflict pain of some kind if you partake in this pointless habit (no offense meant to smoker friends!).
#3. seek feedback. ask for your supervisors' opinions about your performance. learn from what they tell you instead of feeling insulted if there's something you could work on (and there's always something you could work on).
#4. play well with others. hey, napoleon, try not to devise plans to take over others' projects or take a more-than-just-curious interest in fellow workers' activities. along with that, there should be no reason for an intern to check up on or ask the status of another's (unrelated) work. (p.s., nothing, NOTHING, annoys me more than this).
#5. don't date your coworkers. don't consider dating your coworkers. george clooney might make office-soulmates sound glamorous, but really, you're probably just setting yourself up for embarassment. (this isn't something i have experience in, by the way, just passing on some ancient wisdom-- there's nothing more unprofessional than hearing which other interns are "supercute!!" just keep it out of the workplace.)
#6. speaking of romance, don't talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend or life-partner or whomever on the phone all day. i love boys too, but limit your luuuurve convo to a minute on your cell phone in the spare office down the hallway. just a thought.
#7. don't let other people use your computer. they might just surf the web under your account information. :)
#8. lunchtime dining etiquette: don't eat pizza (and all other foods, not inclusive of hors d'oeuvres) with your hands. knife + fork = not caveman.
#9. also, lunchtime doesn't need to be a production. pick a place to eat food, consume said food, and walk back to the office. in the us, i was used to 15-20 minute lunch breaks, with maaaybe another 10 minute break for coffee around 4ish. in germany, however, the standard is a full-hour, and they'll think you're crazy if you don't use it. it was hard for me to adjust to a more leisurely pace for 60 minutes each day, but sometimes one has to turn the ambition-o-meter down, eh?
#10. when i first started this internship, i was pretty ashamed of my german abilities (somedays, i still am). but communication, not perfection, is what's important. see, that's a healthy attitude, right mom & dad? :)
#11. don't cry at the office. whatever you do, don't cry at the office.
#12. might i suggest some appropriate suiting options? (they should give me a discount or a commission or something).
#13. as cdiddy always taught us, a firm handshake and eye contact are always important. actually, vital.
#14. be on time. or if you will be late (as you, like me, might be at the mercy of public transportation) call the office and tell them that the s4 to kronberg forgot to stop at the hauptwache today, thereby disabling you from being the first in to turn on all of the lights, put the hot water on for coffee and smile pleasantly as everyone comes in after you.
#15. be flexible. company cultures vary just as in different countries. don't get easily annoyed by little things. at the same time, though, stick to your standards.
#16. ask for help. ask questions. be humble. don't be afraid to turn to other interns or supervisors to find out a better way of doing something. again, as cdiddy says, "people like to help other people."
well, that's all i could think of for now... feel free to add any insights in the comments! it's been a great five months!!
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that said, i thought i'd reflect upon some of the little lessons intern life has provided over the past 150-odd days. may i present:
la petite princesse's guide to being a good intern
#1. always work hard and stay busy. (corollary: write posts for website at home the night before and not when you should be putting together presentations or doing financial analysis. like right now, i'm in my apartment).
#2. don't smoke in the office. when a semi-obscure '90s artist sang "cigarettes will kill you" he failed to mention that coworkers might kill and/or inflict pain of some kind if you partake in this pointless habit (no offense meant to smoker friends!).
#3. seek feedback. ask for your supervisors' opinions about your performance. learn from what they tell you instead of feeling insulted if there's something you could work on (and there's always something you could work on).
#4. play well with others. hey, napoleon, try not to devise plans to take over others' projects or take a more-than-just-curious interest in fellow workers' activities. along with that, there should be no reason for an intern to check up on or ask the status of another's (unrelated) work. (p.s., nothing, NOTHING, annoys me more than this).
#5. don't date your coworkers. don't consider dating your coworkers. george clooney might make office-soulmates sound glamorous, but really, you're probably just setting yourself up for embarassment. (this isn't something i have experience in, by the way, just passing on some ancient wisdom-- there's nothing more unprofessional than hearing which other interns are "supercute!!" just keep it out of the workplace.)
#6. speaking of romance, don't talk to your boyfriend or girlfriend or life-partner or whomever on the phone all day. i love boys too, but limit your luuuurve convo to a minute on your cell phone in the spare office down the hallway. just a thought.
#7. don't let other people use your computer. they might just surf the web under your account information. :)
#8. lunchtime dining etiquette: don't eat pizza (and all other foods, not inclusive of hors d'oeuvres) with your hands. knife + fork = not caveman.
#9. also, lunchtime doesn't need to be a production. pick a place to eat food, consume said food, and walk back to the office. in the us, i was used to 15-20 minute lunch breaks, with maaaybe another 10 minute break for coffee around 4ish. in germany, however, the standard is a full-hour, and they'll think you're crazy if you don't use it. it was hard for me to adjust to a more leisurely pace for 60 minutes each day, but sometimes one has to turn the ambition-o-meter down, eh?
#10. when i first started this internship, i was pretty ashamed of my german abilities (somedays, i still am). but communication, not perfection, is what's important. see, that's a healthy attitude, right mom & dad? :)
#11. don't cry at the office. whatever you do, don't cry at the office.
#12. might i suggest some appropriate suiting options? (they should give me a discount or a commission or something).
#13. as cdiddy always taught us, a firm handshake and eye contact are always important. actually, vital.
#14. be on time. or if you will be late (as you, like me, might be at the mercy of public transportation) call the office and tell them that the s4 to kronberg forgot to stop at the hauptwache today, thereby disabling you from being the first in to turn on all of the lights, put the hot water on for coffee and smile pleasantly as everyone comes in after you.
#15. be flexible. company cultures vary just as in different countries. don't get easily annoyed by little things. at the same time, though, stick to your standards.
#16. ask for help. ask questions. be humble. don't be afraid to turn to other interns or supervisors to find out a better way of doing something. again, as cdiddy says, "people like to help other people."
well, that's all i could think of for now... feel free to add any insights in the comments! it's been a great five months!!
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i try and abstain from junk food, but i know two danielles (sister & dg) who are getting these for their respective birthdays, if they are, in fact, for real. :)
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June 25, 2004
well, it's official: one day of work left on monday. i'm leaving in a few minutes as i've taken a half-day off to go to beautiful sasbachwalden for the weekend to visit my favorite german family!
reality that this internship (five months!) & time over here is ending is setting in...
i hope everyone has a lovely weekend! more on monday...
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reality that this internship (five months!) & time over here is ending is setting in...
i hope everyone has a lovely weekend! more on monday...
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June 22, 2004
i usually try and keep politics out of this site because i feel that i am hardly a source of up-to-the-minute, credible news and information, nor do i possess an extraordinary political mind. but this article is too good not to pass around: christopher hitchens writes in "unfairenheit 9/11" (courtesy of slate, by way of anti-climacus). this isn't about partisanship, by the way, or about anything other than good-filmmaking and presenting the truth to people who expect education and enlightenment. so go and see the movie-- wait in line for three hours, and pay your $8.50, and leave angry, hurt, infuriated that the world has come to this. you should feel that way, but not because of this film. if only in an effort to view situations from different angles, keep this article in mind, and remember that things aren't as simple as they seem-- and that conveniently-packaged rhetoric isn't enough of a basis from which to make decisions. hitchens writes:
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If Michael Moore had had his way, Slobodan Milosevic would still be the big man in a starved and tyrannical Serbia. Bosnia and Kosovo would have been cleansed and annexed. If Michael Moore had been listened to, Afghanistan would still be under Taliban rule, and Kuwait would have remained part of Iraq. And Iraq itself would still be the personal property of a psychopathic crime family, bargaining covertly with the slave state of North Korea for WMD. You might hope that a retrospective awareness of this kind would induce a little modesty. To the contrary, it is employed to pump air into one of the great sagging blimps of our sorry, mediocre, celeb-rotten culture. Rock the vote, indeed.although a very talented filmmaker, in the sense that he can successfully conjure strong emotions from people like a snake charmer, michael moore has provided another opportunity for citizens of the world to vent their anger about the state of the world, feel outraged at the present situation, to try to stick-it-to-the-man. he makes it easy. too easy, in fact. moore compacts images, sounds, and tasty half-truths into a microwaved tv dinner, and by the time you've devoured the last crumb he's put in front of you, you feel satisfied and grateful, but what you might not expect is, you're still malnourished; the fact is, the spliced shots and courageous-sounding rhetoric and bonus-cookie at the end aren't enough, and shouldn't be enough, for any of us.
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June 21, 2004
while mom, cdiddy & danielle were in baton rouge for nana & papere's 60th wedding anniversary (congratulations!!) and seeing the fam & uncle dane, i stayed in frankfurt for my last full weekend in town. flore, a good friend from last term in reutlingen, visited & we played tourist-- walked all through the city, dodged the rain, discovered a nutella-themed restaurant, got threatened by a homeless man, looked in pretty stores, went in the frankfurt cathedral, and, in an effort to absorb european culture, watched the germany-latvia europameisterschaft soccer game in a downtown sports bar.
in said establishment, during all 94 minutes of the game (including four minutes of extra play for some reason) + halftime and commerical breaks (which i estimate to have been approximately 130 minutes), i came to several realizations, the most profound of which is: i know absolutely nothing about europeansoccer football. sure, i played like a champ on my first through third grade teams (coached by our very own cdiddy) and lend support during sports matches by shouting "hustle!" at players, but my education in this area has been insufficient. i tried really, really hard to pay attention, but seemed to zone out once or twice. that or i was hypnotized by the patterns on the green fields, or meerly captivated by this guy.
a small sampling:
after flore left, also had best talk ever (even if part of it involved powdered deer blood) last night with "roommate," who just got a great new internship (congratulations!) and has also generously offered to throw a 21st birthday party for me on august 27 or 28 at her new apartment. so if you're in bloomington right before fall term, let me know... i can guarantee that it will be fun :)
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in said establishment, during all 94 minutes of the game (including four minutes of extra play for some reason) + halftime and commerical breaks (which i estimate to have been approximately 130 minutes), i came to several realizations, the most profound of which is: i know absolutely nothing about european
a small sampling:
#1. how do they get the field to look plaid like that?in all, it was a good match, ending unexcitingly with a 0-0 tie. just like the last game. however, i did participate in a cultural event, enjoyed two glasses of mineral water, and have a new boyfriend (but don't worry bode, you're still my favorite), so i considered the day a success.
#2. who is this "schweinsteiger" and why does the announcer keep shouting his name?
#3. i would not like to have any sort of confrontation with the german team's goalie. no i would not.
#4. this water really is much better with a slice of lime in it. in fact, everything tastes better with lime in it.
#5. ouch! that must have hurt.
#6. pretty uniforms! i mean, handsome. whatever.
#7. the crowd just yelled, something must have happened...
#8. how can there be 60 minutes left in this game?!
after flore left, also had best talk ever (even if part of it involved powdered deer blood) last night with "roommate," who just got a great new internship (congratulations!) and has also generously offered to throw a 21st birthday party for me on august 27 or 28 at her new apartment. so if you're in bloomington right before fall term, let me know... i can guarantee that it will be fun :)
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June 18, 2004
it's my second-to-last friday of work! just six days left, at sundown tonight! i've absolutely loved this internship (been five months now in m&a) and coworkers, but i think some change is in order. i'm working on closing the apartment at the end of june (which will be sad-- i've loved the "chateau-deux"), finalizing travel plans (switzerland, uk, france, and a little more in germany), trying to figure out how to get out of my mobile phone contract, and generally seeing how far a paycheck can be stretched. flight back to michigan is in mid-july!
the 5.6k jpmorgan chase thing was very fun on wednesday-- almost 52,000 people showed up to stampede through downtown frankfurt. (p.s. nothing will keep you running like knowing that if you so much as slow down or stop, you will be trampled by the 500 people directly behind you). i think i over-did it, though, by jogging the distance back as well; not good for my achilles tendon problem. that said, it was an intense but fun adventure, and ended with a swank rooftop party thrown by company (i only wish i hadn't come directly from a workout). i met a lot of people in different departments, spent time with teammates, and had a great time-- until i wore out and went home at 10pm. :)
also, flore, a french friend from reutlingen last semester is arriving tonight, so i'm staying in frankfurt again this weekend, and plan to play tourist and enjoy what might be my last full weekend in town... i can't believe this is all winding down...
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the 5.6k jpmorgan chase thing was very fun on wednesday-- almost 52,000 people showed up to stampede through downtown frankfurt. (p.s. nothing will keep you running like knowing that if you so much as slow down or stop, you will be trampled by the 500 people directly behind you). i think i over-did it, though, by jogging the distance back as well; not good for my achilles tendon problem. that said, it was an intense but fun adventure, and ended with a swank rooftop party thrown by company (i only wish i hadn't come directly from a workout). i met a lot of people in different departments, spent time with teammates, and had a great time-- until i wore out and went home at 10pm. :)
also, flore, a french friend from reutlingen last semester is arriving tonight, so i'm staying in frankfurt again this weekend, and plan to play tourist and enjoy what might be my last full weekend in town... i can't believe this is all winding down...
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June 16, 2004
if (and it's a big if) i can get done with my projects on time, will run in the jpmorgan chase corporate challenge, a 5.6k through downtown frankfurt with 51,140 runners from 1,831 companies. concurrently, also races in nyc, boston, chicago, sydney, london, and even claire's "rochacha" (rochester, ny). should be fun! am excited for it (already got my company's team tshirt), plan to run with two other interns and my team director, and just hope feet can hold up for one last little event before surgery this summer. :)
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June 15, 2004
just so you know: after 13+ years of struggling to learn the german language (the first four years of which involved a whimsical dialect known as swiss-german or schweizerdeutsch; if you've heard it, you know why it's so much fun), i have given up on the official verbalage of germany, austria, switzerland, and lichtenstein.
that's right-- the white flag of surrender had been raised, and despite the facts that #1 i must speak german all day at my job, #2 i live in germany right now, and #3 i study german (among other things) in college. i've tried-- i've really tried. i have always loved german classes, novels, poetry, fellow students, excursions, teachers (best ever), and the general spirit of the language. when spoken correctly, it's beautiful. but right now something's amiss.
here's how i see the current situation: my grammar is um, unencumbered by rules and restrictions in general (as some of you know der/die/das/den/dem/nominativ/genetiv/akkusativ/dativ/etc. is a killa), my accent horribly anglicized (despite true efforts to integrate local phrases and dialects) to the point that even the turkish guy who sells döner kebaps on the corner speaks english to me, and my overall abilities rival only those of a four-year-old. a non-german four-year-old.
you might wonder, what caused this sudden change of heart? after all, german and i have had a great relationship--nay, friendship-- for a long time. i'll tell you... yep, just "enjoyed"/caused a little scene that ranks up there in my "top ten very most embarassing moments at work" list. ooo was it super! maybe it will be funny tomorrow.
in the meantime, am looking for a new language to take german's place during his... sabbatical. could anyone recommend a good chinese tutor? 再見暫且，德國人，喂中國人！
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that's right-- the white flag of surrender had been raised, and despite the facts that #1 i must speak german all day at my job, #2 i live in germany right now, and #3 i study german (among other things) in college. i've tried-- i've really tried. i have always loved german classes, novels, poetry, fellow students, excursions, teachers (best ever), and the general spirit of the language. when spoken correctly, it's beautiful. but right now something's amiss.
here's how i see the current situation: my grammar is um, unencumbered by rules and restrictions in general (as some of you know der/die/das/den/dem/nominativ/genetiv/akkusativ/dativ/etc. is a killa), my accent horribly anglicized (despite true efforts to integrate local phrases and dialects) to the point that even the turkish guy who sells döner kebaps on the corner speaks english to me, and my overall abilities rival only those of a four-year-old. a non-german four-year-old.
you might wonder, what caused this sudden change of heart? after all, german and i have had a great relationship--nay, friendship-- for a long time. i'll tell you... yep, just "enjoyed"/caused a little scene that ranks up there in my "top ten very most embarassing moments at work" list. ooo was it super! maybe it will be funny tomorrow.
in the meantime, am looking for a new language to take german's place during his... sabbatical. could anyone recommend a good chinese tutor? 再見暫且，德國人，喂中國人！
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June 14, 2004
even trips made on a whim, booked last-minute, and devoid of solid lodging arrangements can be the most incredible. in this sense, a long weekend spent in italy with four great friends would have made even (my hero) bill bryson proud.
several weeks ago, a three-day weekend was to take place, thanks to "christ goes to heaven" day. i had originally planned to meet up somewhere prague-ish with molly and her famous brother alec, but didn't hear of any plans until wednesday (vacay starting friday after work). apparently, molly & alec would arrive in venice friday night, and she said she hoped to meet up with stefanie (who was studying in florence for the summer) and me. then another very pleasant surprise: danielle b. was also in italy for the summer (who knew?!), and could meet us too!! to make a long story short, after tens of panicked emails, two phone calls to the german railway, and one discounted online flight reservation, italy was going to happen.
on friday night after work, i took the night train from frankfurt, direction milan. i enjoyed a, erm, cozy sitting berth with five other people (which was fine-- i was just so happy to be going in the first place), and awoke at 5:30am to see the incredible mountains and beautiful towns of northern italy. we arrived at milano centrale 11 minutes after the connecting train to venice was supposed to depart, and i made a fine spectacle while sprinting through the entire station with a hiking backpack (have you met "big blue" yet? you should) and three hours of sleep in a chair to make the connection. luckily, being italian, this new train was also (20 minutes) late. hey, at least they're consistent.
the regional train to venice presented a sightseeing tour of beautiful cities: verona, something-a, and others that sounded pretty and probably were. at 11ish, the train pulled into venice (venetia, more accurately), and, after thrwarting an intended fright from alec (who was instructed to approach and jabber in fake-italian, undoubtedly terrifying me), reunited with molly & danielle! soon, the detomonster (stef) arrived from florence with another surprise: three other dgs in tow! how incredible to all meet up in italy!
we prowled all through the town, had lunch canal-side, caught-up, took pictures, watched alec pose for pictures with a sampling of europe's best beverages, almost took a dive into the ocean, peeked in stores, took the requisite gondola ride, contemplated recreating the heist scene from "the italian job" film, got lost a trillion times, and had a wonderful day. i would list all of the attractions, but will instead direct you to venice's home page. :) we stayed overnight in a pensione just outside of town (and sang incomprehensible songs with french people on the train going there, must mention that, d, m, & s). the next morning, said a sad goodbye to danielle, and trained to florence.
florence is the city i had always wanted to go to, and the one family trip i missed while living in switzerland years ago. it is an incredible, lovely city. beautiful, friendly, and, well, rather perfect. stef led us through the town to her so-called "pensione" (which should translate to "castle" or "mansion-e," har har) at the piazza santo spirito. um, she & the other 30-some iu students who live here for eight weeks have perfect chambers, dining rooms, the biggest balcony terrace ever & THE view of the city. even photos won't do it justice... i just kept screeching, "you LIVE here!?" uh, good choice on overseas study, stef!
alec, molly & i found a more modest but very cute address for the evening near stef's place, walked all through the city, had a great dinner at the piazza, then walked through the entire town at dusk. the duomo/cathedral was incredible. the square with statues was incredible. even kiosks selling postcards were incredible. it was just overwhelming. at that time, it was too late to see the uffizi or accademia (which holds THE david), so instead we saw everything from the outside and ate gelato. sorry, mom! :)
i know i'm missing a lot of detail here about venice & florence-- add any details, etc. in comments, if you want!
although i would have preferred to be "stranded" in florence with friends, a little thing called "internship: the key to not becoming homeless in future" pulled me back to frankfurt. molly dropped me off at the florence station on monday morning, so i could take a train to bologna, another train to forli, and a bus to the forli airport to catch my thrilling but economical germanwings flight to köln/bonn, followed by a bus to köln, another train to frankfurt, and a subway to the apartment. phew.
the travelling was more than worth it: this weekend was amazing-- i had an incredible time, friends! many thanks to alec, molly, stefanie & danielle! can't wait to see you again!
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several weeks ago, a three-day weekend was to take place, thanks to "christ goes to heaven" day. i had originally planned to meet up somewhere prague-ish with molly and her famous brother alec, but didn't hear of any plans until wednesday (vacay starting friday after work). apparently, molly & alec would arrive in venice friday night, and she said she hoped to meet up with stefanie (who was studying in florence for the summer) and me. then another very pleasant surprise: danielle b. was also in italy for the summer (who knew?!), and could meet us too!! to make a long story short, after tens of panicked emails, two phone calls to the german railway, and one discounted online flight reservation, italy was going to happen.
on friday night after work, i took the night train from frankfurt, direction milan. i enjoyed a, erm, cozy sitting berth with five other people (which was fine-- i was just so happy to be going in the first place), and awoke at 5:30am to see the incredible mountains and beautiful towns of northern italy. we arrived at milano centrale 11 minutes after the connecting train to venice was supposed to depart, and i made a fine spectacle while sprinting through the entire station with a hiking backpack (have you met "big blue" yet? you should) and three hours of sleep in a chair to make the connection. luckily, being italian, this new train was also (20 minutes) late. hey, at least they're consistent.
the regional train to venice presented a sightseeing tour of beautiful cities: verona, something-a, and others that sounded pretty and probably were. at 11ish, the train pulled into venice (venetia, more accurately), and, after thrwarting an intended fright from alec (who was instructed to approach and jabber in fake-italian, undoubtedly terrifying me), reunited with molly & danielle! soon, the detomonster (stef) arrived from florence with another surprise: three other dgs in tow! how incredible to all meet up in italy!
we prowled all through the town, had lunch canal-side, caught-up, took pictures, watched alec pose for pictures with a sampling of europe's best beverages, almost took a dive into the ocean, peeked in stores, took the requisite gondola ride, contemplated recreating the heist scene from "the italian job" film, got lost a trillion times, and had a wonderful day. i would list all of the attractions, but will instead direct you to venice's home page. :) we stayed overnight in a pensione just outside of town (and sang incomprehensible songs with french people on the train going there, must mention that, d, m, & s). the next morning, said a sad goodbye to danielle, and trained to florence.
florence is the city i had always wanted to go to, and the one family trip i missed while living in switzerland years ago. it is an incredible, lovely city. beautiful, friendly, and, well, rather perfect. stef led us through the town to her so-called "pensione" (which should translate to "castle" or "mansion-e," har har) at the piazza santo spirito. um, she & the other 30-some iu students who live here for eight weeks have perfect chambers, dining rooms, the biggest balcony terrace ever & THE view of the city. even photos won't do it justice... i just kept screeching, "you LIVE here!?" uh, good choice on overseas study, stef!
alec, molly & i found a more modest but very cute address for the evening near stef's place, walked all through the city, had a great dinner at the piazza, then walked through the entire town at dusk. the duomo/cathedral was incredible. the square with statues was incredible. even kiosks selling postcards were incredible. it was just overwhelming. at that time, it was too late to see the uffizi or accademia (which holds THE david), so instead we saw everything from the outside and ate gelato. sorry, mom! :)
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i know i'm missing a lot of detail here about venice & florence-- add any details, etc. in comments, if you want!
although i would have preferred to be "stranded" in florence with friends, a little thing called "internship: the key to not becoming homeless in future" pulled me back to frankfurt. molly dropped me off at the florence station on monday morning, so i could take a train to bologna, another train to forli, and a bus to the forli airport to catch my thrilling but economical germanwings flight to köln/bonn, followed by a bus to köln, another train to frankfurt, and a subway to the apartment. phew.
the travelling was more than worth it: this weekend was amazing-- i had an incredible time, friends! many thanks to alec, molly, stefanie & danielle! can't wait to see you again!
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June 09, 2004
while most of you were grilling hamburgers, enjoying a quiet evening home with the fam, watching tv, or doing something equally productive (therefore making the most of summer) last night, i spent three hours of Quality Time with the other corporate finance interns, a warehouse, and about 102 dead people and internal organs.
o yes, silly me, i had agreed to go to professor gunther von hagen's körperwelten ("body worlds" in english) travelling "exhibit" (and by that i mean "freak-nasty meat festival"). as it turns out, it was not so much an "engrossing insight into the human body" as a "gross insight into a human freak." honestly, what posessed this professor von hagen to do such a thing? actually, let's not think about that... but as i unhappily discovered last night, it's a massive collection of skinned, dead bodies, vital organs, and-- surprise, surprise, unborn babies, preserved with a plastic polymer and filleted for all the world to "enjoy." very hannibal lector.
i know what you're thinking: "camille, you barely made it through the two-month rat dissection in eleventh grade! 'the ring' gave you nightmares for months! let's face it: you're a 20-year-old wuss. why o why would you pay money to see such a thing?"
an excellent question, my friend. i am asking myself the same thing. but i'll tell you what happened: simple, old-fashioned peer pressure and insecurity. you see, in an effort to be social/fun/cool and also not totally squander the evening with my dvds, three fellow praktikanten invited me along to this famous & popular show (just in frankfurt for three more days), and i said yes (my boss mercifully sent us home at 8pm since we had been working nonstop forever). i guess i learned nothing from that d.a.r.e. program in elementary school (except about crack). so i thought i'd hang out with the cool kids, act brave, and succumb to temptation.
and what fun it was: inside this warehouse of fun lurked hoardes of former-humans, several babies, a horse, and a gorilla (thrown in for good measure), which stood plasticized on pedestals and in display cases for eager audiences. i won't get into too much more detail because you might be dining on pâte right now.
the highlight of the evening (besides almost fainting in front of 2,000 people) was meandering up to an inconspicuous-looking display case to examine a gray-colored specimin. before i had even identified what it was, an attendant had rushed up, unlocked the case, and -- get this -- plopped a human liver into my hands. o yes he did. i screamed bloody murder terrifying the poor man, jumped about 30 feet in the air, and only upon crash-landing saw the sign next to the display case: "touch a real human organ!"
now, you could argue that the whole experience was educational. indeed, it was: i learned a whole lot about the whims of the human body, and also some bonus tips to life-prolongation such as:
but eventually, all four of us made it out alive. significantly educated, freaked-out, and €9 lighter, we stumbled out of the building at 11pm and headed our separate ways. despite differing opinions as to it's scientific value, we all have körperwelten to thank for one fun lifestyle change: strict, devout vegetarianism. and for goodness' sake, never, ever, EVER again liver-and-onions for dinner.
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o yes, silly me, i had agreed to go to professor gunther von hagen's körperwelten ("body worlds" in english) travelling "exhibit" (and by that i mean "freak-nasty meat festival"). as it turns out, it was not so much an "engrossing insight into the human body" as a "gross insight into a human freak." honestly, what posessed this professor von hagen to do such a thing? actually, let's not think about that... but as i unhappily discovered last night, it's a massive collection of skinned, dead bodies, vital organs, and-- surprise, surprise, unborn babies, preserved with a plastic polymer and filleted for all the world to "enjoy." very hannibal lector.
i know what you're thinking: "camille, you barely made it through the two-month rat dissection in eleventh grade! 'the ring' gave you nightmares for months! let's face it: you're a 20-year-old wuss. why o why would you pay money to see such a thing?"
an excellent question, my friend. i am asking myself the same thing. but i'll tell you what happened: simple, old-fashioned peer pressure and insecurity. you see, in an effort to be social/fun/cool and also not totally squander the evening with my dvds, three fellow praktikanten invited me along to this famous & popular show (just in frankfurt for three more days), and i said yes (my boss mercifully sent us home at 8pm since we had been working nonstop forever). i guess i learned nothing from that d.a.r.e. program in elementary school (except about crack). so i thought i'd hang out with the cool kids, act brave, and succumb to temptation.
and what fun it was: inside this warehouse of fun lurked hoardes of former-humans, several babies, a horse, and a gorilla (thrown in for good measure), which stood plasticized on pedestals and in display cases for eager audiences. i won't get into too much more detail because you might be dining on pâte right now.
the highlight of the evening (besides almost fainting in front of 2,000 people) was meandering up to an inconspicuous-looking display case to examine a gray-colored specimin. before i had even identified what it was, an attendant had rushed up, unlocked the case, and -- get this -- plopped a human liver into my hands. o yes he did. i screamed bloody murder terrifying the poor man, jumped about 30 feet in the air, and only upon crash-landing saw the sign next to the display case: "touch a real human organ!"
now, you could argue that the whole experience was educational. indeed, it was: i learned a whole lot about the whims of the human body, and also some bonus tips to life-prolongation such as:
1) don't smoke, your lungs will turn black and won't look nice and spongy like the healthy set lying next to it at a warehouse in frankfurt;the whole thing was a bizarre blend of quasi-scientific insight into the human physique/life cycle and psycho-death-circus-freak-show. it was pretty traumatizing, to be honest. so naturally, i'm sharing the fun with you all.
2) don't drink too much alcohol (same reason, just with liver);
3) don't let social insecurities and a lack of plans for the evening give you justification for spending said evening with the deceased;
4) if a mysterious german professor invites you into his laboratory for a "check-up," whatever you do, do NOT go in there.
but eventually, all four of us made it out alive. significantly educated, freaked-out, and €9 lighter, we stumbled out of the building at 11pm and headed our separate ways. despite differing opinions as to it's scientific value, we all have körperwelten to thank for one fun lifestyle change: strict, devout vegetarianism. and for goodness' sake, never, ever, EVER again liver-and-onions for dinner.
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June 07, 2004
it's my 15th straight hour of work today, and there's still more m&a fun to be had this evening! just had to tell someone, because i'm the only one left on the floor right now... ironically, 15 days of internship left! :)
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am back in f-f-f-frankfurt (making it musical makes it prettier, no?) after spending saturday & sunday visiting friend sarah from wales in heidelberg for the weekend (p.s., nicest german city EVER & only 50 minutes away...who knew!?). work is craaazy right now (a good thing; means there's lots of projects going on), so i will post a run-down if anyone is interested (?) this week, and will finally get around to writing about the best ever italy trip from two weekends ago.
in other news, mom & dad celebrated their 36th anniversary, biggy got an a on her chemistry test, nawar & qaisar left to go back to saudi arabia (i'm thinking about you two! can't wait to talk!), clare's come down with the lsats but is brilliantly fighting it off, cousin annie started a new job (congrats!), matt & laura sent awesome photos from geof & kate's wedding, brittany and whitty are in london now, had a great convo with roommate/nicole yesterday, friend nina might come to visit this weekend, and if the corporate finance gods look favorably upon me, might be able to go with danielle b. to prague this weekend! we'll see... hope everyone's doing well. :)
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in other news, mom & dad celebrated their 36th anniversary, biggy got an a on her chemistry test, nawar & qaisar left to go back to saudi arabia (i'm thinking about you two! can't wait to talk!), clare's come down with the lsats but is brilliantly fighting it off, cousin annie started a new job (congrats!), matt & laura sent awesome photos from geof & kate's wedding, brittany and whitty are in london now, had a great convo with roommate/nicole yesterday, friend nina might come to visit this weekend, and if the corporate finance gods look favorably upon me, might be able to go with danielle b. to prague this weekend! we'll see... hope everyone's doing well. :)
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June 04, 2004
something to think about: a powerful story from fellow iu hoosier josh claybourn-- summing it up here just wouldn't do it justice-- seriously, what a great guy.
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June 03, 2004
um, washington post, you're kinda freaking me out here... writer libby copeland gushes in her sorta-scary three-page ode to the olsen twins, exerpt below:
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No dollmaker could have designed a better mold for the nation's maternal instincts...Even now, their huge blue-green eyes, enhanced by sooty makeup, recall those big-eyed waif paintings of the 1960s. Their hair -- layered and styled into starlet fullness -- seems too big for them. They are both less than 5 feet 2 inches tall -- in their recent movie, "New York Minute," Mary-Kate stood on apple boxes for her kissing scene. This smallness helps reinforce the notion that two little Olsens make one big Olsen, which is, after all, the basis of their career. Who is Mary-Kate without Ashley? Who is Ashley without Mary-Kate? And who are we without them, making unity from the division in our souls?mk & ashley uniting the division in our souls? erm, no judgement, libby...
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June 02, 2004
am in the office early this morning & as i am waiting for an assignment to come my way, decided to catch up on current events: heard-tell on the hoosier review (with a hilarious article by karl born) and whatevs.org that both the coca-cola company and pepsi are launching new low-carbohydrate colas. sounded good to me (certainly good news for cola-chugging amis), but upon closer inspection noticed this: "c2 ... contains 12 grams of carbs, compared to regular coke's 27 and diet coke's 0."
the new "low-carb" cola is made with a confusing blend of splenda artificial sweetner (recommended by atkins) and HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP (um, not recommended by anyone).
whawhat, my diet coke with lime isn't good enough for the atkineers?
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the new "low-carb" cola is made with a confusing blend of splenda artificial sweetner (recommended by atkins) and HIGH FRUCTOSE CORN SYRUP (um, not recommended by anyone).
whawhat, my diet coke with lime isn't good enough for the atkineers?
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June 01, 2004
i have to add this too, or i might take my frustrations out against something (or someone) more vulnerable than a website. i am not a complainer, but i will be for the next five minutes. :) this might be a classic case of good friends/fun/warm weather/italy/vacation withdrawal, but today has been really tiresome. two of my colleagues are smoking rather potent cancerettes in their office again (causing violent allergic reactions to my system), the city auslandsamt is sending me cryptic letters again (which will require me to pay even MORE money to the city & bring more forms explaining that i am just a harmless student), i just want to be home with my family in michigan and friends in indiana, i can't understand what the new intern is saying because of her regional dialect (she has to literally repeat every sentence 2x... not good after my 13+ years of german), people keep talking too loudly, it's cold outside, and i am still here working when it was a declared half-day (it's a frankfurt anniversary fesitval thing of some sort so the company announced free time) and the other interns and several coworkers have left.
okay, i'm over it, now back to work. :)
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okay, i'm over it, now back to work. :)
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oh, and the trip to venice & florence this weekend to see stefanie, danielle, molly & alec was incredible. best weekend ever & italy was fun too-- the full story tomorrow, hopefully :)
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i'm glad to read that the man behind the raunchy spam messages that have flooded my inbox for the past month is going behind bars. may his punishment include the mandatory reading of 10,000 emails offering body parts enlargement possibilities or pharmaceuticals to enhance other activities Each And Every Day throughout his sentence. or hopefully longer.
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